What's Law School Like?

I guess the impending school year is getting on top of me, but I keep having thoughts about how best to explain this strange career (and particularly the hiring process) to those who have not yet embarked upon it.  And what better way to do it than through pop culture.  Some random thoughts:

1/ I've always wondered if one could make a video game out of the tenure process?  My original thought was an old-fashioned platform game (think Sonic the Hedgehog) where the little tenure track character has to make his/her way through a maze of cranky senior colleagues hurling books and criticisms that (s)he has to duck, while attempting to pick up "points" in the form of law journal placements and good teaching reviews.  Any budding gamers out there want to try and code this one?  I wouldn't claim any IP rights - I'd just like to play the game.

2/ Or how about basing the staple of the hiring season - the job talk - on American Idol?  So the candidate finishes the job talk and then Ryan Seacrest jumps out and says something like, "Well, the faculty seemed to like it, but what did the judges think?"  Then you go to a panel of deans/associates deans and the hiring chair - you can decide who at your school should play Randy, Paula and Simon (although I guess Paula may now have to be replaced because I think she's officially off the show now).  Any budding directors want to film this one and put it on YouTube?

3/ Then, there's the possibility of basing the job talk on BBC's Dragon's Den - the show where you pitch your brilliant idea to a group of entrepreneurs in the hope that one of them will give you the capital to back it in return for an equity share in your business.  So you finish the job talk and then ask the faculty to invest in you by giving you a job in return for an equity stake in your career.  The "dragons"/entrepreneurs could be the faculty mentors or the members of the school's P&T committee.

Any other pop culture thoughts on academic careers for those about to enter the hiring fray?

Comments

[Tim Zinnecker]

Maybe we should conduct the interviews in the style of the old McLaughlin Group (at least as satired by SNL). After every answer from the candidate the hiring chair could puff up and say "WRONG. The correct answer is ...."

Maybe we should schedule all campus visits on the same day, with a concluding group interview with the hiring committee in the style of THE APPRENTICE. Candidates have to "bad mouth" the competition, and then the hiring chair says, to one of the candidates, "You're not hired."

Or how about an AMAZING RACE among interviewees? Don't tell them your suite number in DC (or switch it at the last minute, leaving a clue on the door). Oh, the possibilities for endless fun!

[Jacqueline Lipton]

Ah, Tim - HOW could I forget about The Apprentice? Thanks for reminding me. But who gets to be "The Donald"??

Actually, when I interviewed at a British school some years ago, they did all the campus visits on the same day and all the candidates met each other and had lunch together, and then at the end of the day they told us who was hired and who was "going home". There were 3 slots and 6 candidates so it was basically a competition between two people for each slot. We all had to wait in a "holding room" while each of us in turn gave a brief 10-15 minute job talk, and then we had a group lunch with faculty in the faculty lounge. Very weird experience. And on top of it all, not only did they offer the jobs on the day of the interviews, but they also wanted immediate acceptances.

I also like the idea of doing the Amazing Race in DC - any other takers???

[Tracy McGaugh]

I like both The Apprentice and Amazing Race ideas. But to really take things to the next level, I suggest American Gladiators. Or better yet Wipeout! Maybe southern schools could do Wipeout (since it always seems to take place over water, and it's still swimsuit season in Houston come November) and the northern schools could do American Gladiators (made all the more entertaining by accents from Wisconsin and Minnesota).

Whomever still has all their teeth at the end gets the job!

[Howard Wasserman]

How about interviews conducted a la James Lipton of "Inside the Actors' Studo"?

[David Friedman]

The Gong Show. A perfect way to cut a job talk short.

[Jacqueline Lipton]

I love these ideas, particularly "Inside the Actors Studio" which I never would have thought of but it could be fun to write the stack of question cards: "And then you took a clerkship at an interesting place, known as the Supreme Court. Tell us about that experience..."

[anon]

The tenure process is like sorority/fraternity rush. Chug chug chug!!

[Tung Yin]

"The Apprentice" is hilarious, but that's more suited to MBA programs with the team challenges, no? Maybe "Top Chef" or "Project Runway" would be slightly better fits as the model for the hiring process. Each candidate could be given a random selection of cases and told to assemble a coherent 15 minute lecture . . . in just 2 hours. Hiring committee members would wander through the room during this preparation period to help/taunt the candidates. And after performing, the candidates would have to stand in a line, waiting to be divided into three groups -- the best, the survivors, and the worst. And then the worst would get critiqued, and then one would get bounced.