While many people will tune in tomorrow night to celebrate the year's best in film at the Academy Awards, a polar opposite celebration will be happening tomorrow to recognize the WORST in film of 2008. The 29th annual Razzie Awards take place tonight, and I must say that I am very excited to see the winners. Or perhaps losers.
This awards show gives recognition to that brilliant genre of film known as "sobaditsgood." This is very different than grindhouse films of the Attack of the Killer Tomatoes variety. These movies were made to produce a profit. And they are stultifyingly cringeworthy. Scoliosisting, in fact. Perhaps the worst film of all time is Showgirls, with personal favorites/schadenfreude of Mariah Carey's "Glitter", "Basic Instinct 2," and the all time, untouchable, hands-over-your-mouth, stomp-the yard, on-a-pedestal, B-A-D: "Mommie Dearest."
Don't &@$# with me fellas! This ain't my first time at the rodeo. -Faye Dunaway as Joan Crawford
As a voting member of the Razzie Academy, I am particularly supportive of M. Night Shyamalan's "The Happening," which was spectaculary, penetratingly terrible. One blogger describes it as "a dream -- not a good dream or a nightmare, but the really loopy, tammy faye bakker-on-a-unicorn kind." Marky Mark Wahlberg did not feel the good vibration in this movie whatsoever. I ohmygodded myself at least 700 times throughout every minute of this cinematic delight of AWFUL. Highlight: Marky Mark approaching an abandoned house in rural Pennsylvania with a rendition of "Old Black Water" as musical incentive to the hermits to share their food.
And the nominees.....
WORST PICTURE
_____ DISASTER MOVIE and MEET THE SPARTANS
_____ THE HAPPENING
_____ THE HOTTIE AND THE NOTTIE
_____ Uwe Boll's IN THE NAME OF THE KING: A DUNGEON SIEGE TALE
_____ THE LOVE GURU
WORST ACTRESS
_____ Jessica Alba / THE EYE and THE LOVE GURU
_____ The Cast of THE WOMEN
(Annette Bening, Eva Mendes, Debra Messing, Jada Pinkett-Smith and Meg Ryan)
_____ Cameron Diaz / WHAT HAPPENS IN VEGAS
_____ Paris Hilton / THE HOTTIE AND THE NOTTIE
_____ Kate Hudson / FOOLS' GOLD and MY BEST FRIEND'S GIRL
WORST ACTOR
_____ Larry the Cable Guy / WITLESS PROTECTION
_____ Eddie Murphy / MEET DAVE
_____ Mike Myers / THE LOVE GURU
_____ Al Pacino / 88 MINUTES and RIGHTEOUS KILL
_____ Mark Wahlberg / THE HAPPENING and MAX PAYNE
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